So I found this great little author on Instagram last year actually he found me. I randomly had an author ask to follow me totally unaware but thought hmm I could sound super cool if an author followed me. (Now I have 2 authors following me I must just be so super cool). So I decided to check out his book I find it on amazon first the reviews were good thought hmm must be worthwhile so I read it I loved it I cried its up there with those books you can’t forget well now a year later he puts out another book but I read Invincible Summer and wow I’m usually terrible at marking quotes in books (not that I would heaven forbid deface a perfectly good book just sticking paper in between pages) but this book was just like his first it cut you deep it made me emotional awhile reading it and really made me think a lot. One of the first quotes I felt was:
“it is so hard to let yourself love
To push out all the monsters in your head and stand tall and say, you know what, I am worthy of this, and I’m gonna do this even if it hurts, even if I wake up one day hating the world for introducing me to something so magnificent and hen snatching it away
And then you do it
And you wonder
Why in the hell you’d waited so long”
I guess this stuck with me because I think I’m afraid of loving people. I’ve never been the girl that has much luck with guys I’ve always been told I’m pretty I honestly never believed any of it until I lost all my weight but even still not much interest. But with the few interests I’ve had I’ve never been the person that gets chosen. I guess in some ways I feel as though I’ve always been rejected. I had someone who made me happier than I’ve ever been and there for a while I was chasing that same happiness and it took me realizing I need to be happy with myself before I can find it in anybody else. I guess this quote gives me hope of what my future can hold. This may sound weird but I have never thought of myself of deserving of anything I don’t know if it mostly stems from the grace I get from God but I’ve never thought I deserve anything. I often times think that I am such an undeserving person therefore I must struggle and have a hard life just to show more what I can overcome and how mentally strong I am. But that’s nottrue love is free it costs nothing to give it especially to those who do not deserve our love but most of all those who do and love us back.
“Being evil is easy, loving can be hard. But love always wins, because it is in the hearts of the strong that it will always live on and prosper.”
And then I find this and feel like I just made that point in my last explanation. But you know I’ve never felt myself to be evil. I can be rude and sarcastic but I never try to be hurtful. When I am being honest I have found that I can be without that being my intentions. I guess I just feel that it is hard to be loving you have to consider what your going to say to someone and how it will affect them and because you care so much for them you don’t want to hurt them.
I got this reading journal from a fellow book loving friend for Christmas I have loved keeping up on what I’m reading and instantly writing my opinion sand thoughts of the book and so far this book I wrote more about than any other. I must say this book will be like its previous and always stick with me. I’m not sure if I did his book any real justice in this review but maybe it will provoke you enough to read it yourself. I am currently reading another book by the same author called Honesty so maybe it will get a review also.